Pondering similarities
September 2, 2008 | 7:30 amA good mix of different personalities, roles and experiences increases the creativity and quality of teamwork. In groups and any kind of collaboration, we need diverse angles of approach. We ought to choose members in a team on purpose with diversification in mind, but if you are like me, the first thought is to choose people like yourself. You know, some people you just immediately get along with and relationship feels natural. Other people are more troublesome and hard to understand. What if we too soon exclude people? Perhaps they are hard to understand, because you are different. What would happen if we took a step towards them and tried to build something together? I am playing with the thought that some possible connections pass by unnoticed because of preconceived ideas.
Differences first
We are usually quite fast to categorize people when we meet; most of the time we see differences first. The first thought is accompanied with a feeling. We compare ourselves with the other person in some areas. Either it turns out favourable for us or we feel inferior. We might feel envy, insecurity or contempt and distance. As a result we put a label on the other person. We see what’s separating us and hang on to that. If we look at our behaviour a bit more closely, it has actually an egoistic smell on our part. Why do we choose the differences first?
Similarities first
What would happen if the first thing we do, we look for things that connect us with the other person, things we have in common? We can first try to build a bridge, even if it is a tiny one. At least we are two human beings; that’s something at least. Connecting to and cooperating with someone that is unlike you is powerful. It could be worth the extra energy we have to put into it. Diversification is a key to survival in nature.
I was thinking along these lines while standing in a queue at a grocery store a few days ago. I looked at each person in the queue while noticing my own reactions. There were different ages and different social statuses represented. Some looked cool and self-confident, other confused, insecure or overbearing. IÂ noticed my initial thoughts about them. But we were all humans; we all stood in the same queue buying groceries, probably facing the same kind of troubles in life.
More on this subject:
Living inside walls
Your thoughts are not you